September 1st, 2015
blog
When you think about it, don’t you think it’s strange that two people who don’t really know each other or have only just met can struggle to have a meaningful conversation? You may have even experienced a moment in your life when you’ve been out on a date only to run out of things to talk about. So why is it that so many people struggle to maintain a strong conversation even if they’ve only just met each other?
Shouldn’t there be a lot to talk about? Firstly, a large part of this experience is because either one of, or both people think they don’t have anything interesting to talk about. Maybe they think they are boring people in general. If this is something you feel like then you will always have a tough time having an engaging, interesting conversation with someone. You can address this by starting to focus on all the good things about yourself, why people would like you, what is interesting about you. If you have a belief that you are boring and uninteresting then it will come through in your demeanour, and this doesn’t help create a connection with someone. Another reason could be poor conversational skills. This is much easier to fix than the first problem.
The easiest way to fix this is to ask deeper, open-ended questions and then elaborate on something your partner says. A deeper kind of questions means getting to know them at a deeper level so knowing their passions, interests, how they feel about certain topics. The way you elaborate is to simply make a statement about what it is they tell you. It could be a statement on the topic about something you experienced in your own life, or simply a thought and opinion. These are some simple ways that you can start having longer conversations on dates instantly. Ask open-ended questions and make statement about things your partner talks about to help create connections.
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